Boundary Boss: The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen, and (Finally) Live Free by Terri Cole

In Boundary Boss, psychotherapist Terri Cole reveals a specific set of skills that can help you stop abandoning yourself for the sake of others (without guilt or drama), and get empowered to consciously take control of every aspect of your emotional, spiritual, physical, personal, and professional life. Since becoming a Boundary Boss is a process, Cole also offers actionable strategies, scripts, and techniques that can be used in the moment, whenever you need them.

For me, this book made setting boundaries feel less overwhelming. Each chapter has companion exercises included in the back of the book. What I enjoyed most is that the exercises were very specific, helped clarify my thoughts, and didn’t take so long that I dreaded them. What further sets this book apart from other books on boundary-setting is the sample languages: Cole gives you actual words that you can use to start boundary-setting conversations, while simultaneously reminding you not to expect perfection. This book jump-started my boundary-setting skills.

“Clearly, Rachel didn’t want to be vulnerable, which is exactly what speaking honestly with her boyfriend would require. She felt ill-equipped to ask him why he would drop out of sight for days or weeks and then reappear as if nothing happened. So, in essence, she was saving herself from the pain of facing her feelings of being unimportant or discarded.”